Mine was fine, although Christmas, in and of itself meant I had to go shopping. Which, I suppose for most people would be a joy, but for me it was a chore, you see I am not a shopping person, I hate shopping, and unlike most other women on the planet (if the newspapers are to be believed) I do not make a hobby of shopping. Nope, shopping is a chore, even the weekly grocery shop is undertaken with a morose sense of inevitability, so I do it today and I am going to have to do it again in another week. Nope. I am not a shopper, therefore Christmas shopping (even with a VERY VERY large bonus in the bank thanks to my wonderful boss) is a chore. I wandered around the regular places (the dollar stores, Target etc. with the exception of Walmart, I will not darken Walmart's door's on a matter of princple) where was I before I opened those brackets? Oh yes, I got various things that resembled presents for my husband as well as a boat load of stuff for the pets, knowing of course that Cueball would demolish them within five seconds of them being introduced. Must say however that the squeaky hamburger has lasted the whole day and is still intact, how long that premise holds up is anyone's guess. So other than cooking breakfast and dinner I spent most of the past two days taking photos of birds. Yesterday, to my utter delight the red bellied woodpecker decided to visit the posing table. Not only was he close to my camera but he splayed his tail to keep himself balanced and it turned out to be (what I believe) a beautiful shot. Hope you enjoy it.

So let me premise this entire story with the fact that the dogs are not allowed outside unsupervised right now due to Judy coaching Cueball to headbutt his way out of various obstacles and thereby gaining their freedom to the front of the house. Once there they generally frolic for a few minutes before deciding that it is way too cold for that type of behavior and Judy instructs Cueball to headbutt open the front door and in they come. So, to make sure that they do not do one of their escape routines while we are at work, the dog door in the kitchen is closed when I leave for work and is not opened again until I return. In this weather (read bleedin cold) it is not a problem as they tend to snuggle into the couch and sleep all day. Also the cats tend to remain in the house all day to keep warm, despite the fact that their much smaller cat door is always open should they suddenly feel the need to go outside. My husband has just finished school for the Christmas break so he was home, already fast asleep on the couch, having let the dogs out when he got home and then closed the door again when he decided to take a nap. So with this scene now set firmly in your mind I merrily enter the house carrying several bags of groceries. I lug the bags into the kitchen and put them down on the kitchen floor to get ready to put them away. I notice that Cueball appears to be particularly interested in an empty cooler that I keep in the utility/storage area of my kitchen, I leave the lid off it (and resting against the side of it) in order to avoid the inevitable musty/mouldy problem but also in there were two cushions which I use on my kitchen stool when I am taking photos out of the kitchen window. So I wander over to the cooler thinking that perhaps one of the kittens is in there and annoying Cueball and I see:
a) one of the kittens annoying Cueball
b) a lizard trying to escape from the cold
c) a possum, sleeping quite happily in the warmth of the cooler.

Most people would have chosen a) or b) but those who have known me and followed my adventures for a while know with certainty that the most unlikely answer is in my life most likely the correct one. As did I when I noticed a very long nose and some very long teeth. I blink, and call Cueball back. There lying quite happily in the cooler (although presently baring its teeth at Cueball) is a full sized Possum. I stood and took in the scene for a second, the possum, once it had finished baring its teeth settled snugly back down onto the cushions in the cooler and appeared, at least to me, to be quite happy. At this point, I stood in the middle of the kitchen and realized the points I had laid out before. The dog door was closed and had been all day, the cat door was open, but the cat door is very small, AND mores the point, other than the fact that it is very cold, what an EARTH would possess a possum, to enter a home where invariably it KNOWS live three dogs and seven cats? What the hell was it thinking? I just think that it must have been really, really cold. So I set up the pet gate between the living room and the kitchen and go to rouse husband (who you will recall is sleeping soundly on the couch. At this point I would like to point out that I have seen my husband only fleetingly, like ships passing in the night, of late due to his hectic and busy schedule, he came in the door the other night before midnight and I thought to myself "hmmmmm you look very similar to a man I used to be married to once") I prod him gently "Sweetie I need your help" he opens his eyes "I am sorry to wake you but there is a possum in the kitchen" he blinks "is it dead" (which was a silly question really because he knows from past experience that I am perfectly capable of disposing of a dead animal, not that I enjoy the experience you understand but you know I can do it without assistance.) He rouses himself a little, "a possum?" he asks again. I assure him that yes there is a possum in the kitchen and seeing as a) it is alive and b) it has teeth, I am going to need his help in some fashion to remove the offending beast to the great outdoors. After reviewing the scene for a moment (and retrieving some heavy leather gloves just in case) we decided that the best plan of action was to place the lid on the cooler and tote the entire shebang outside, possum and all whereupon he could be released to the wild, to live out his life, cold but unscathed. So off husband and I went into the garden (dogs still safely behind the dog door) and placed the cooler on its side at the bottom of the garden. Husband lifted away the lid and we waited for the possum to make a break for freedom. Nothing, husband poked the cooler a little with his foot, nothing. We both peered around the edge of the cooler and saw that the possum was lying there unwilling to move. "It's dead" says the husband "it's a possum and it was hissing and baring its teeth five minutes ago" says I, he pokes the cooler again with his foot "why won't it move" he says "its a possum" says I. "Why won't it leave the cooler" he asked at which point my lungs are about to burst "IT'S A POSSUM! IT IS PLAYING POSSUM" He taps the cooler again with his foot for good measure and we go back into the house. An hour later I decide to go outside and check that the possum has finished playing possum and left the cooler. But no, as luck would have it the possum, for some reason only known to the possum, had crawled onto one cushion and SOMEHOW pulled the other cushion over its body and was quite happily napping inside it's own version of a comforter. I shone the flashlight at the possum whereupon it woke and bared its teeth at me but then, obviously not feeling at all threatened by me, snuggled back under his cushions and went back to sleep. "You have to leave sweet pea" I tell the possum, he looks at me, and snuggles back down, "no sweet pea you really have to leave" the possum got up, enough for me to see that it was not injured at all. He walked around at bit, bared its teeth again, and promptly settled back under its cushions. I decided at this point that I should, if I were going to back up my story, go inside and get my camera so I could take a shot of the sleeping possum, safe in his cooler. So I headed back to the house. Wouldn't you know it, by the time I had got back to the cooler the possum had decided he wasn't going to get any sleep because of the idiot human with the flash light and had left. However, and it is a big however, has anyone any clue how the possum would have got in the house in the first place? Now I know I am assuming that it was through the cat door, but WHY? AND more's the point, why didn't the dogs even notice that a full size possum had got into their house? Yup I really know I am not in Kansas anymore.

As you all sit there, with a belly full of christmas food, warm and safe in your homes, think for a second of the soldier out there (Okay I am not going to do the politically correct thing of including the coast guard, Navy, air force etc in this post because for the most part they are not sat in a hole in the desert)...but just remember as you sit their patting your stomach after the Christmas Dinner that out there in a hole in the desert sits a soldier or marine (both US and UK) who's only companion is his gun, who sits there knowing that some idiot out there would like nothing more than to kill him and who, with his sense of duty and commitment sits and defends our freedoms. The fact that you can eat your christmas dinner in peace is bought by the lives of these brave boys. So for a moment, stretch back from the laden table that is christmas dinner and give thanks, thanks every day to these brave boys who are sitting in a hole in the desert, steadfast in their belief that they are fighting for our freedoms, and promise me the next time someone tells you that we are "losing the war in Iraq" you will smack the ever loving tar out of them..... and to the boys out there - good night and god bless guys... may you stay safe and may your god go with you. My heart and my soul are with you, and if wishing can become reality then not a single one more of you will die, but if you must die then only know that you have died in the cause of freedom.

It is amazing to me. When I first moved to this country from the UK I viewed the homes decorated with lights during the christmas season as silly. "Pah" I would say in a loud and hearty voice "look at those idiots, wasting all that electricity and can you imagine what their bills look like?" My husband would listen to me silently, head bowed, wishing that he could perhaps put up a single strand of lights on a bush outside in some sort of sign to others of his kind that he had not completely been trodden down by the oppressor. Then one January I was wandering round the garden center at Lowes and I came upon their christmas clearance section. They were selling those nice icicle lights at 75cents a box. So there stood I, conflicted beyond belief, torn between icicle lights at 75cents a box, in other words the greatest bargain on the planet, and my thrifty nature when it comes to conserving electricity. I bought ten boxes of the lights and that year the house was delicately decorated with the icicle lights and very pretty it looked too, my husband grinned smugly whenever he came home from work. A while later I happened by the Salvation Army thrift store when it just happened to be having a huge yard sale, boxes and boxes of christmas decorations all part of a $5.00 bag sale, in other words whatever you can stuff inside a brown paper bag is $5.00. Do you know how many sets of lights you can get inside a brown paper grocery bag? No? Well let me tell you it is lots. The next year I decided in my wisdom that my alien yard statue (who is precious by the way) just HAD to be surrounded in green lights and I also thought how cool it would to have a nice big green X behind him on the tree (for the X-files of course) as well as wearing a santa hat and carrying a candy cane. So a trip to Target was in order. Now let me say, that me going to the christmas light section of Target at this time of year is simply dangerous, kid in a candy store, alcoholic in a brewery, dog in a butchers shop, you name the cliche that is me in the christmas light section of Target this time of year. Last year I made the mistake of going to Family Dollar after christmas and found a lighted buck and doe at 75% off. Then of course I went to Goodwill, looking for something unrelated and I found a set of three lighted christmas trees for the yard on sale (on sale at Goodwill even). It used to be that I owned ONE extension cord, which I used to power my nice little (and for my tiny frame manageable) black and decker electric weed-eater. I checked this weekend as I was getting my supplies together that I now have ten extension cords, of various sizes, lengths, power point availability etc. I have also got the entire shebang connected so well that my entire display is now turned on with the flick of one switch on the porch. Only this Friday I went to a local auction that I attend whenever I have the time and there, like a jewel, sat a cardboard box full of lights, a swift dollar bid later and they were mine. You have no idea the joy it gave me when I plugged each set in and discovered that they all worked, oh joy! It has now got to the point that my ambition, which with my thrifty yard sale, auction and Target shopping will be achieved, is that come Christmas there will be two things on earth that can be seen from space, the Great Wall of China and my house. Right now I don't even have all the lights up as the vinyl siding men will be visiting soon so I don't want to make their job more difficult, so my other lights sit dim, and miserable in their boxes at the moment waiting for the moment when I will hang them and plug them in. Of course my mother, being a thrifty sort herself, berates my apparent lack of sense when it comes to christmas, I have an excellent excuse however, whenever she tells me that "your electric meter will be spinning around like a top" I tell her I am okay, and besides, its not my fault, I have been taken over by the pod people.

Isn't it amazing how a love of a thing will stay with you throughout your life no matter what happens. My recent (okay the past two years) love of bird feeding and photographing my birds was a love inside me that had been there for a long time but had sat dormant. Cast your mind back if you will, it is 1988 and I am serving at MHQ (Maritime Headquarters) Pitreavie, the headquarters for the Flag Officer Scotland and Norther Ireland as well as the Nato headquarters. My desk just happened to be in the curve of a large bay window, outside of which sat a rather nice section of garden which was the entire surroundings of MHQ Pitreavie. It occurred to me, as I sat gazing out of my window that a bird feeder might look quite nice out there, not only to feed the birds but to alleviate my boredom when having to "weed" classified files (which is a long and painstaking task that without a doubt will make your head hurt). As it was I had a couple of tame sailors who were good with a hammer and nails and to my delight they constructed a simple "bird table" for me, a simple piece of wood attached to a post, sunk into the ground. Once the bird table was in place I bought the required amount of seed and scattered it on the table. It was a success, the birds loved it. As time progressed I added other things, suet feeders, half coconuts and soon not only the birds but the local squirrels would visit, both grey and red. The funniest sight I have ever seen, I think in my life, is when a grey squirrel encountered half a coconut. The look on the animals face was priceless "THAT is the biggest acorn I have ever seen!" whereupon the squirrel removed the half coconut from it's hanger and then proceeded, over the course of a couple of hours at least, to remove the half coconut to its nest. There was a great deal of shuffling involved, hold coconut under one arm, hop a little, coconut slips, transfer half coconut to other arm, shuffle a bit, attempt to climb tree, drop coconut, retrieve coconut with teeth and arms, attempt to push coconut up tree with nose and arms, drop coconut, retrieve coconut, shove coconut up tree with back legs, drop coconut, grab coconut with teeth and front legs again and push VERY SLOWLY up tree, inch, by inch, by inch, until FINALLY you get it in your nest. I do not think that I will ever forget that afternoon, in my office, watching the squirrel attempt to safely get the coconut home. And I do not think I will every forget those wonderful days when the ground was covered with three or four inches of snow watching my birds, out of my office window eating the food that I had provided for them. And that is why, now, I spend way too much money on bird food, and spend an inordinate amount of time at my kitchen window watching my birds feeding. There is just an enormous amount of satisfaction to be had when the world is freezing to see a bird stuffing his or her face with seed that you have provided knowing that without your help the birds would be cold and hungry, scratching about in the snow for the odd seedhead that is not yet frozen. There are those who say that we shouldn't feed wild birds, as it makes them dependent on us, but it is a cold heart indeed who can see a bird in the snow and not think that some really good food could help at that point.